First day for Seraphine going to school wearing the “grown-up” cravat of Middle School;
First time Conrad sees his old school from the outside, not in;
First time Blake’s old sports teacher has seen him in a year;
First time we took our new au pair on what will be a fixture of this year, the school run bus;
Old and new, a happy blur of memory laid and overlaid till I can hardly keep track which classroom was which child’s…and discovering today that I don’t really need to keep track any more, either.
Because those memories that rise readily to the surface are sharp and enjoyable enough, and after all these years there is many a familiar face still to be hugged on the pavement; and then there’s tech-backboned mnemonics like Facebook’s “On This Day” to add copiously to the sighs; and for the rest?
Well – the rest can be let to fall away on their own natural weight, I’ve learnt. For there needs be room for yet more love to enter the “system”, which Alan referred to as the relationship between one human life and another. There is me, you, and the space and connection between us… and for each one of “me”s there are several “you”s, so the system as a whole is really an ecosystem.
And the art and practice of living in the present fully encompasses the savour of memories lingering long enough to be enjoyed for what they are – vanishing memories – not clung on to and kept forcibly alive…and, on the other side of the spectrum, the eager awaiting of things to come, to which Hume referred in stating that “anticipation of pleasure is, in itself, a very considerable pleasure.” Again – same light touch – to be enjoyed for what it is, not clung on to, fantasy strapped into the role of reality, kept forcibly alive.
Then the “first”s, the “last”s, and all the everyday inbetweens, that are logically and qualitatively no different from and no less worth appreciating than these milestone firsts and lasts, can truly be simply seen and accepted and loved and thanked for what they are…beautiful moments in the flow of life.
PS. Didn’t mean to pontificate. ☺️ but you know me by now, ’tis par for the course. I have been given such amazeballs to digest and integrate from last week’s meditation retreat that the stuff is working away at me whether I like it or not… and truth be told, it is already making such an empirical positive difference in my day-to-day that I must say I am liking it a LOT. More to follow when I start getting some modicum of bandwidth back. 📝
PPS. Yep. This was munchkinite Blake, posted on this day 7 years ago, on his very first day of school. 👦🏻💞